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Bar Chat

03/01/2012

For Many of Us...Sweet Memories

Chicago Cubs Quiz: [Easy one.] Name the five Cubbies who played in 2,000 games in a Chicago uniform. All in the Hall of Fame…but one did play with the team from 1876-1897. Answer below.

Davy Jones, RIP

About an hour before I was to go to post, I learned of the death of the lead singer of the Monkees at the age of 66 of a heart attack. He had complained of chest pains last night. I will have more as appropriate next chat. But for now…this is what I wrote about six years ago.

Hey, Hey, We’re the Monkees!

A few years ago my friend Harry K., from up in the Great White North, said the Monkees were one of the most underrated musical acts of all time. And the more you look at the body of work, the more you have to agree, even if it wasn’t always theirs.

But first…the Monkees’ top Billboard hits:

9/66: Last Train To Clarksville, #1
12/66: I’m A Believer, #1
12/66: (I’m Not Your) Steppin’ Stone, #20
3/67: A Little Bit Me, A Little Bit You, #2 [written by Neil Diamond]
7/67: Pleasant Valley Sunday, #3
8/67: Words, #11
11/67: Daydream Believer, #1
3/68: Valleri, #3

Six top three singles in about one year; not too many others can claim that.

It all started back in 1965 when writer/director/producer Bob Rafelson had the idea for a sitcom, using the Beatles’ film “A Hard Day’s Night” as the model.

In September of that year an ad appeared in the Hollywood Reporter and the Daily Variety. [wording is correct]

“Madness!! Folk & ROLL, Musicians Singers for acting roles in new TV series. Running parts for 4 insane boys, age 17 to 21. Want spirited Ben Frank’s types. Have courage to work. Must come down for interview. Call: HO 6-5188.”

437 hopefuls showed up including Stephen Stills, who was supposedly turned down for having bad teeth. Others included Paul Williams and the future leader of Three Dog Night, Danny Hutton, who made the final eight.

[The VH-1 Rock Encyclopedia says, however, that the story that Charles Manson auditioned is not true. He was serving time in prison then and wasn’t released until March 1967, much to the chagrin of Sharon Tate et al.]

The four who were signed were David “Davy” Jones, a stage actor and apprentice jockey in Britain; Mickey Dolenz, a child actor in various network shows, including “Peyton Place”; Peter Tork (Thorkelson), recommended by Stephen Stills and a fellow who was playing the Los Angeles folk circuit; and Michael Nesmith, also a member of the L.A. folk scene. Tork and Nesmith thus had some musical ability, while Jones and Dolenz were actors who could also sing.

[Jones appeared on “The Ed Sullivan Show” as part of the cast of “Oliver” the very same night the Beatles made their U.S. debut.]

Filming began on a pilot episode in November 1965, and NBC bought “The Monkees” for its 1966 fall schedule. On September 12 of that year it premiered. The initial response was great. For two full seasons, 58 episodes, “The Monkees” garnered great ratings and won an Emmy Award for Outstanding Comedy Series, 1966-67.

Of course any fan of music knows the Monkees were the first, and the best, of the prefabricated Sixties and Seventies pop groups (including the Partridge Family and the Archies). But to many they were also hard to take seriously, though thanks to the songwriting of Diamond, Tommy Boyce, Bobby Hart, Gerry Goffin, Carole King, and Neil Sedaka, all brought in by Don Kirshner who took over the show, the group made some super records as the above list attests to. And it needs to be mentioned that the real leader, Mike Nesmith, contributed heavily to the songwriting.

But initially the record company didn’t let the four boys play on the recordings and instead employed some of the best session artists in the business, including James Burton, Leon Russell, Glen Campbell, David Gates, and Hal Blaine. [Another, Louis Shelton, is responsible for the opening guitar line of “Last Train To Clarksville”.]

Well, you can imagine that as the Monkees’ popularity soared, the issue over who was really behind the sound came to a head. From Irwin Stambler’s “History of Rock and Roll”:

“The problem facing the group was that its record firm, Colgems, didn’t want to tell the public that the TV group did only the vocals. This made things very embarrassing, as Nesmith recalled, when the group began to make personal appearance tours. By then, they could play reasonably well on stage, but couldn’t reproduce some of the excellent sounds of their initial recordings.”

The fact screaming hordes of fans attended every show helped drown out the music.

“The group argued among themselves about what to do, but Nesmith finally told a New York press conference in 1967: ‘There comes a time when you have to draw the line as a man. We’re being passed off as something we aren’t. We all play instruments, but we didn’t on any of our records (to then). Furthermore, our company doesn’t want us to and won’t let us.’”

Look magazine ran the story and Screen Gems, owner of the television show, called for a meeting with the group.

“There was a heated argument about Nesmith’s demand that the group be allowed to play for its own recordings from then on. Company executives reminded him he could be legally suspended according to his contract, in reply to which, Nesmith later told a reporter: ‘I rammed my first through a door. I told the man who said that: ‘That could have been your face,’ and walked out. We did the instrumental work on the next album.’” [Source: Rolling Stone Encyclopedia of Rock]

As it turned out, while record executives were concerned, the quality of the Monkees’ next few albums, some of which included many of their biggest hits, was good and for this reason alone the Monkees need to be reappraised from time to time. They were real, sports fans.

The Monkees toured worldwide in 1967 and ’68 and Mickey Dolenz deserves credit for discovering Jimi Hendrix. Hendrix opened for the group for 12 dates before moving on to Monterey and stardom of his own. Actually, the audience who came out to see the Monkees didn’t know what to make of Hendrix’ act and booed him, thus the exit before his contract was up.

But as happened all too frequently with the groups of the 60s, the Monkees disbanded after just a few years. Tork quit at the end of December 1968, buying out his contract for $160,000, after which he was broke because he spent every other dime he had made. The others muddled on for a year before Nesmith quit in the beginning of 1970. Dolenz and Jones attempted to carry on but it didn’t work.

In the end, though, as Harry K. said, yes, they were underrated and the ultimate test is their music has easily stood the test of time. By the way, Harry tells me Nesmith’s mother invented Liquid Paper. [It’s true…Bette Nesmith Graham.]

College Basketball

AP Men’s Poll

1. Kentucky
2. Syracuse
3. Kansas
4. Duke
5. Michigan State…then lost Tuesday to No. 20 Indiana, 70-55
6. North Carolina
7. Missouri
8. Marquette
9. Baylor
10. Ohio State
12. Murray State…No. 9 USA TODAY/ESPN
15. Wichita State
20. Notre Dame
21. San Diego State
24. Virginia

Starting Saturday, it’s a fun stretch for hoops fans with the mid-major conference tournaments. The Big South, Ohio Valley Conference and Atlantic Sun all have their title games, and the automatic NCAA tournament bid, on Saturday. I’ll be glued to the tube at 2:00 pm that day, hopefully watching Murray State in the OVC final.

One conference tournament that will be intriguing is the Horizon one, where Butler, which struggled much of the year, has nonetheless gotten its act together late in the season. Can they make it to another Big Dance, needing to win the Horizon tournament outright to qualify?

As a recent piece by John Antonini of Golf World put it, 1912 was the best birth year for any one sport…in this case golf.

Feb. 4, 1912…John Byron Nelson Jr. is born in Long Branch, Texas

May 27, 1912…Samuel Jackson Snead is born in Hot Springs, Va.

Aug. 13, 1912…William Ben Hogan is born in Stephenville, Texas

One year you could say rivals 1912 is 1931, which saw the birth of four of the members of the 500 home run club…Willie Mays, Mickey Mantle, Ernie Banks and Eddie Mathews, though only the first two are truly among the game’s absolute best whereas Nelson, Snead and Hogan would handily fit in any ten best list for their sport.

1887 gave us Walter Johnson, Grover Cleveland Alexander and Eddie Collins.

1934 saw the births of Hank Aaron, Al Kaline and Roberto Clemente, but, again, neither of these two years give you three super greats. Kaline and Collins, for example, aren’t going to be in the top ten or even twenty of their sport.

As for football, John Antonini notes that Lawrence Taylor and Ronnie Lott were born in 1959, but there is no comparable third player. Four members of the Pittsburgh Steelers were born in 1952 (Mike Webster, Lynn Swann, John Stallworth and Jack Lambert), but none would be on a top 30 list of greatest football players of all time (Taylor and Lott, on the other hand, would be…my opinion).

One year for football that is intriguing is 1933…the Baltimore Colts’ Johnny Unitas, Raymond Berry and Lenny Moore all being born that year.

In hockey, you have 1961…Wayne Gretzky, Mark Messier and Paul Coffey of the Edmonton Oilers’ dynasty…that actually could give golf’s 1912 an interesting argument, I guess.

But as Antonini writes, “perhaps our biggest challenger (is basketball and 1963). Michael Jordan, Hakeem Olajuwon, Charles Barkley and Karl Malone, all born that year. All four of these are in Bill Simmons’ top twenty all time. Hmmm.

Ball Bits

--The collector of Ryan Braun’s urine sample, Dino Laurenzi Jr., issued a statement.

“This situation has caused great emotional distress for me and my family. I have worked hard my entire life, have performed my job duties with integrity and professionalism, and have done so with respect to this matter and all other collections in which I have participated.”

Laurenzi says that at the time of the test, he obtained a signature from Braun, stipulating that the samples were capped and sealed in his presence, and that he followed all proper protocols set by Comprehensive Drug Testing, his employer. There has been zero talk that the samples were unsealed by the time they got to the testing center. Laurenzi has been with the company since 2005, conducting more than 600 collections since then.

--The Washington Nationals have been making every right move it seems the past few years as they build a team that can contend on a consistent basis. If I was a Nats fan, I’d be fired up over the prospects for the franchise.

But $100 million for third baseman Ryan Zimmerman for six years is way too much. Granted, he’s just 27, but the last two years he wasn’t exactly the budding superstar he appeared to be in 2009, and before. Yes, injuries played a role, but he’s already showing signs of David Wright disease, declining production.

--Minnesota Twins first baseman Justin Morneau said his career may be in jeopardy if chronic complications from concussions don’t subside….very depressing.  “There comes a point you can only torture yourself so long,” he told reporters the other day.

He isn’t Minnesota’s only problem, either, as reliever Joel Zumaya may have to retire after tearing a ligament in his right elbow. The 27-year-old once budding superstar out of the pen has suffered one serious injury after another. Another sad story.

--Word out of Mets camp is that slugger Lucas Duda is ready to bust out. I’m upping my projected win total for the Mets from 38 to 41.

--But Mets fans received dreadful news on Monday when owner Fred Wilpon broke his silence long enough to say, “We intend to own the franchise for a very long time,” before referring to fans when he said, “Whether they are happy about that right now or not, I don’t know.”

--Not a bad deal if you’re in the military out San Diego way. The Padres are selling discount season passes for troops in the lower pay grades for $99 for one upper reserved seat for up to 80 home games (excluding Opening Day). Geezuz…that’s a sweet deal! Good for San Diego management in extending such a terrific offer to a deserving group.

“OK, that’s that, people. The house lights are on. Square your tab, grab your coats, call a taxi. Don’t have to go home, but you can’t stay here. The Boston Red Sox have banned booze in the clubhouse.

“That’s right. Happy days are gone again. No more beer in the Red Sox locker room. No more wine tastings in the outfield or frozen margaritas on the base paths. No more coaches standing on the pitcher’s mound with a cocktail shaker, asking the guys if they prefer their martinis sweet or dirty.

“Look: Adults are allowed to consume adult drinks, but the Red Sox may have gotten carried away. Did you watch them last year? Players were chasing after fly balls while holding 27-ounce German pilsners. Hitters were nursing whiskey sours in the on-deck circle. The Fenway Park bat rack had a separate row for California whites, and the Gatorade container was full of hot buttered rum. The bullpen spent the first three innings slicing limes and mulling mint. Tom Collins got signed to a three-year deal.

“The Red Sox were Captained by Morgan. That famous red B looked as if it was made out of hand-dipped Maker’s Mark wax. Boston resembled the company softball team for Sterling-Cooper. It was always the fifth inning or 5 o’clock somewhere.”

Yes, after a 7-20 September and one of the all-time choke jobs in baseball history as Boston failed to make the playoffs, alcohol was an easy scapegoat. So now new manager Bobby Valentine banned booze in the clubhouse.

But what of Captain Morgan…switching gears.

In the March 2012 issue of Wired magazine, Lee Simmons has a blurb on him.

“That spicy gent on the rum bottle? Real guy. And a real drunk.”

“The pirates who haunt our multiplexes are modeled on real-life rogues, like Blackbeard and Bartholomew Roberts, who plied the Caribbean in the early 1700s. But they in turn were inspired by an earlier chap named Captain Henry Morgan. Yes, that Captain Morgan. The swashbuckler on the rum bottle was a real person – and probably the greatest marauder ever to sail the Spanish Main.

“Morgan captured his first ship in 1663, at age 28, and was soon commanding a whole buccaneer navy called the Brethren of the Coast (featured in Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End), toppling castles and sacking colonies. Technically speaking, he was a privateer; not a pirate. At the wrong end of a cutlass, though, that was an empty distinction: Sailors sometimes encouraged victims to hand over valuables by tightening a cord around their head till their eyeballs popped out.

“Morgan’s remarkable business model would become standard pirate procedure. Officers were often elected, and crews were subject to strict rules (the ‘Code’ delivered by Keith Richards in World’s End) – no gambling aboard, no ‘meddling’ with women. There was even disability insurance: 100 pieces of eight for a lost eye, 500 for a right leg. Admittedly, the real Captain Morgan didn’t always ‘drink responsibly’; one soiree ended when his flagship was accidentally blown up. (He was one of 10 survivors fished from the sea).

“Indeed, Morgan’s greatest achievement was to die in his own bed, a rare feat among pirates. Knighted by King Charles II and appointed deputy governor of Jamaica, he left the sea at 37 to become a wealthy planter, growing sugar cane…for making rum.”

--In an excerpt from his upcoming book, “The Big Miss,” Hank Haney, Tiger Woods’ former swing coach, writes:

“There was more urgency and less fun (as Tiger pursued Jack Nicklaus’ record of 18 major championships)…He never mentioned Nicklaus’ record, but it started to weigh more heavily at every major. And Tiger’s actions indicated he believed he had less time to do it than everyone thought.”

Haney also writes of Tiger’s extreme workouts and his fascination with the military.

“Tiger did two tandem parachute jumps, engaged in hand-to-hand combat exercises, went on four-mile runs wearing combat boots, and did drills in a wind tunnel.” Haney wrote of Tiger’s four days at special-ops training at Fort Bragg, N.C. “Tiger loved it, but his physical therapist, Keith Kleven, went a little crazy worrying about the further damage Tiger might be doing to his left knee.”

According to Haney, Tiger seriously considered chucking it all and becoming a Navy SEAL.

In 78 tournaments with Haney as coach, Tiger had 57 top-10 finishes, with 29 victories, including six majors.

Haney’s book goes on sale a week before the Masters. Needless to say, Tiger isn’t happy. Mark Steinberg, Tiger’s agent, said:

“(Haney’s) armchair psychology about Tiger, on matters he admits they didn’t even discuss, is ridiculous. Because of his father, it’s no secret that Tiger has always had high respect for the military, so for Haney to twist that admiration into something negative is disrespectful.”

I don’t see what’s disrespectful about what Haney wrote….at least that which has been released thus far.

As for Tiger’s putting, ESPN.com’s Rick Reilly writes you can lay the blame on Tiger’s switch from his Scotty Cameron Titleist model to a Nike putter. Woods’ old coach Butch Harmon told Reilly, “If I’m coaching Tiger right now, I’d take the Nike out of the bag and put the Scotty back in and see how good that looks in his hands.”

Tiger is loyal to Nike, though, because they were the one major sponsor that didn’t abandon him after the sex scandal. But the fact is he’s 0-for-6 in majors and winless on the PGA Tour since going to the Nike flat stick.

As former tour player Peter Jacobsen correctly observes, “(It’s) weird, because I think Nike would much rather see Tiger hoisting trophies over his head again than see their swoosh lined up next to his ball.”

--In USA TODAY Sports Weekly, they have a list of the 200 or so college football players at the scouting combine, preparing for the NFL draft.

1. Andrew Luck (Stanford)
2. Robert Griffin III (Baylor)
3. Ryan Tannehill (Texas A&M)
4. Brock Osweiler (Arizona State)
5. Brandon Weeden (Oklahoma State)
6. Kirk Cousins (Michigan State)
7. Nick Foles (Arizona)
8. Ryan Lindley (San Diego State)
9. B.J. Coleman (Tennessee-Chattanooga)
10. Russell Wilson (Wisconsin)
11. Chandler Harnish (Northern Illinois)
12. Kellen Moore (Boise State)

USA TODAY has Moore being projected as a 6th- or 7th-round pick. Unreal. Wilson, just 5 or 6. Both of these guys are flat out winners and will be a steal for whoever takes them. I also have absolutely no idea who B.J. Coleman is.

Among running backs, first five:

1. Trent Richardson (Alabama)
2. David Wilson (Virginia Tech)
3. Lamar Miller (Miami, Fla.)
4. Doug Martin (Boise State)…good for him; always struck me as a player
5. Chris Polk (Washington)

LaMichael James (Oregon) is ranked no. 8 and a projected third-rounder. He’ll be another steal if he goes that late.

Wide receivers:

1. Justin Blackmon (Oklahoma State)
2. Michael Floyd (Notre Dame)
3. Kendall Wright (Baylor)
4. Mohamed Sanu (Rutgers)…huh
5. Alshon Jeffery (South Carolina)

No. 1 fullback is Evan Rodriguez out of Temple. No. 2 is Emil Igwenagu of UMass. My how times have changed at that position.

By the way, Demon Deacon fans. Of the hundreds of players listed, only one is from Wake; linebacker Kyle Wilber, the No. 17 rated at his position and projected to go in round 4 or 5.

--Meanwhile, CBSSports.com says it’s a lock the St. Louis Rams will trade their No. 2 pick, believing Sam Bradford meets their needs at quarterback and there is no reason to draft RG3. CBS’ sources say Washington, Miami and Seattle are prepared to trade up, with Cleveland and Kansas City having lighter interest in doing so. The Rams should be able to get a minimum of two first-round picks of their own in return.

Separately, you still have free-agent quarterback Matt Flynn out there.

--Out of nowhere, NASCAR may have caught a break with Sunday’s first-ever postponement of the Daytona 500 and the switch to prime time on Monday night. Heck, I watched it. Turns out it was the highest-rated Monday night audience for Fox since Game 5 of the 2010 World Series, with 36.5 million viewers, up 22% from 30 million last year. Nothing like a car barreling into a jet dryer to stoke the juices with the resultant spectacular fireball. Matt Kenseth won his second 500, by the way. I turned it off around midnight, 10 laps into the final 40 after the accident.

And, yes, Danica Patrick, despite her troubles during the week, none of which were her fault, is for real and could be a huge boost for ratings. For one, I know I’ll be tuning into the Nationwide Series, knowing she’ll be racing each week. I never thought of doing so before. 

[In finishing second to Kenseth, Dale Earnhardt Jr. extended his winless streak to 130 races…the last time he was in victory lane being June 15, 2008, at Michigan. Just one win, anywhere, would be a big kick for the sport. He’s still the most popular driver.]

--March 2, 1962…Wilt Chamberlain goes off for 100 points in Hershey, Pa., as the Philadelphia Warriors defeat the New York Knicks in a real defensive struggle, 169-147. Good gawd! Wilt made 36 of 63 from the field and, amazingly given what an awful free-throw shooter he was throughout his career, made 28 of 32 tries*. Kobe Bryant’s 81 in a game in 2006 remains the NBA’s second-highest single-game total.

The thing about Wilt’s performance, though, is that few saw it, adding to the mythology behind the record. There was no live television and only two photographers, one of whom left after the first quarter and the other who initially was just a spectator. There were but 4,124 paying fans, half capacity at the Hershey Arena.

At the time it was thought Wilt’s output wasn’t that unusual…that it would be surpassed more than one time in the future. Gary Pomerantz of the Wall Street Journal notes, however:

“(After) Chamberlain reached 69 points at the end of the third, an off-duty Associated Press photographer named Paul Vathis realized that history was in the air. He had brought his son to the game as a 10th birthday present. Vathis went outside to his car for his camera. Planting himself beneath a basket, he took several action photos and a perfectly framed shot of Chamberlain at game’s end walking off the floor, surrounded by the sons of chocolate factory workers, backslapping, reverential, packed 10 deep.

“Vathis had been in the presence of history before. The previous spring, at Camp David for a meeting between President Kennedy and his predecessor, Dwight Eisenhower, Vathis watched the men walk down a stone path.

“ ‘OK, boys, that’s it. Lids on,’ Pierre Salinger, JFK’s press secretary, said to gathered photographers.

“The kneeling Vathis held his position, though, and clicked off one more shot, capturing the men from behind, heads bowed, Ike’s hat in his hands behind his back. His photo would win the 1962 Pulitzer Prize.”

Vathis would get the photo of Wilt holding a handwritten sign, a sheet of paper, with ‘100’ on it. Chamberlain would average 50 points per game for the entire 1961-62 season. When you talk about sports records that will never be broken, that has to be top three (don’t ask me what the other two are…great bar chat at the neighborhood tavern, though).

*Wilt did shoot a career best .613 from the foul line in 1961-62. Overall, his average was .511. One year he only made 38%. Yikes.

--I did not watch a minute of the NBA All-Star Game, though this was in large part because I was attending the Montgomery Gentry concert at that time, but I wouldn’t have watched it anyway.

I do, however, have to make note of Kobe Bryant’s broken nose and concussion as the result of a hard foul from Dwyane Wade. Bryant stayed in the game, but it would really suck if he were to have any long-term effects. It would also make for a deadly NBA Final if out of nowhere L.A. faced Miami. A total mismatch…South Central vs. South Beach.

[Of course the odds of the Lakers making the Finals are about 30-1 the way they are playing.]

“Chris Paul has movie-star qualities on and off the court”

Oh, if you only knew what he did at Wake that cost us a No. 1 seed in the NCAA tournament and a possible Final Four. I’ll never forget it, as much as every other Deacon alum seems to have. 

“Every time he opens his mouth, I fear it might lead to disappointment. So far, the Clippers’ Chris Paul is an absolute wonder, coming across as good a guy as he is an unbelievable basketball player.

“And here I am talking to him again Monday, an off day, just because it’s fun, and that’s why I got into this business.

“Paul makes it seem so easy, which makes it even more ridiculous when others make it so hard to just talk sports….

“He’s a rarity as pro athletes go, and maybe one day yet he goes sour on everyone. Just please don’t tell me, as I’m now rooting for him to make it big here in the entertainment capital.”

--The New York Jets are looking to bring back receiver Braylon Edwards, assuming the price is right. If the guy is healthy, good. He’s still just 29. Edwards was a solid player for the Jets in 2009 and 2010.

The Jets need a big-play guy like Edwards, and they also need to fill the slot left by Plaxico Burress, who the Jets are not going to re-sign. Burress said he wants to play for the Eagles in 2012. “Nothing else would make me happier,” he told a Philly radio station.

--For the bowlers out there, we note that Pete Weber won a record fifth U.S. Open bowling championship Sunday, throwing a strike on his final ball to beat Mike Fagan 215-214 in North Brunswick, N.J. Weber thus passes his father, Dick Weber, and Don Carter who both won four.

--We note the passing of Lynn D. Compton, a lawyer and later a judge once best known for leading the prosecution of Sirhan Sirhan for the assassination of Robert F. Kennedy. But then in HBO’s “Band of Brothers,” we learned that Lynn “Buck” Compton was a decorated war veteran as the story of his “brothers” in the Army’s E Company – also known as Easy Company – in the 506th Parachute Infantry Regiment, part of the 101st Airborne Division, was told by author Stephen Ambrose in his book of the same title.

Compton was one of the 140 men and 7 officers of Easy Company that parachuted into Normandy early on D-Day and later fought at Bastogne. He received a Silver Star, Purple Heart and, along with his unit, the Presidential Unit Citation for heroism in the face of an enemy during the Battle of the Bulge.

Talk about time flying, “Band of Brothers” was first shown in 2001. Neal McDonough played the role of Buck Compton. Compton, while at UCLA, competed in a Rose Bowl.

--Union Rags is now the favorite for the Kentucky Derby after a superb race at Gulfstream Park on Sunday. The Michael Matz horse (think Barbaro…and we bow our heads at the mention of this great one) next runs in the Florida Derby, March 31. J. Mac, we need to remind each other to catch this.

--Uh oh…after being brought back from the brink of extinction, sea otters are dying off again. As reported by the Los Angeles Times, the U.S. Geological Survey reported that 335 dead, sick or injured otters were found in 2011 along the California coast.

Now here at Bar Chat, we like the No. 32 All-Species List sea otter; never to be confused with the highly overrated, No. 134 sea lion.

So what’s the problem? Tim Tinker of the USG’s Western Ecological Research Center says, “We’re starting to see a perplexing trend suggesting increased shark attacks on sea otters.”

Noooo!!!! Oh, there are other factors like disease and boat strikes, but this more aggressive behavior on the part of the shark community is most troublesome. Yet another reason to always sleep with one eye open.

--Lindsay Lohan says she is “clean and sober” as she prepares to host “Saturday Night Live” this weekend.  Heck, I’ll watch this train wreck. She told “Today’s” Matt Lauer that she had put the partying behind her for good. “I went out, actually, a few months ago with a friend. And I was so uncomfortable. Not because I felt tempted, just because it was just the same thing that it always was before. And it just wasn’t fun for me. I’ve become more of a homebody. And I like that.”

--Megan Fox wants to have “at least two, probably three (kids).” And that’s your Megan Fox update for March 1, 2012. You’re reading Bar Chat.

Top 3 songs for the week 3/4/78: #1 “(Love Is) Thicker Than Water” (Andy Gibb) #2 “Stayin’ Alive” (Bee Gees) #3 “Sometimes When We Touch” (Dan Hill…don’t go touching me, Jack)…and…#4 “Emotion” (Samantha Sang… “Sang what?” “No, that’s her name, Sang.” “That’s what I meant, Sang what?” “Samantha Sang.” “Samantha sang what?   Stop playing with me, Dude.”) #5 “Night Fever” (Bee Gees) #6 “Dance, Dance, Dance (Yowsah, Yowsah, Yowsah)” (Chic…where’s my sword…need to commit hari-kari over this one)   #7 “Lay Down Sally” (Eric Clapton…awful…no effort whatsoever and we still bought it) #8 “Just The Way You Are” (Billy Joel…what’s this? An actual great tune on this list?) #9 “I Go Crazy” (Paul Davis…another solid effort by this artist with the long hair) #10 “How Deep Is Your Love” (Bee Gees…incredibly irritating group with four in the week’s top ten, including their brother’s tune…just awful music, as “Airplane” parodied…the latter part of the 70s was a time many of us contemplated moving to a different continent, with different music…Jimmy Carter being in the White House didn’t help…though yours truly would double his grade average this semester over the fall period!)

Chicago Cubs Quiz Answer: Five who played in 2,000 games in a Cubs uniform…all in the Hall of Fame.

Ernie Banks…2528
Cap Anson…2277
Billy Williams…2213
Ryne Sandberg…2151
Ron Santo…2126

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